1 00:00:02,435 --> 00:00:04,837 - POTENTIAL PROBLEM. 2 00:00:04,839 --> 00:00:06,405 THE PREVIOUS OWNER OF LOT 48, 3 00:00:06,407 --> 00:00:07,740 NORQUIST PROPERTIES, 4 00:00:07,742 --> 00:00:09,308 IS CLAIMING THE GOVERNMENT SCREWED THEM 5 00:00:09,310 --> 00:00:11,710 BY ILLEGALLY SEIZING THE LAND. 6 00:00:11,712 --> 00:00:13,579 - WELL, I KNOW ABOUT THIS ISSUE. 7 00:00:13,581 --> 00:00:15,381 I CALLED THE CITY ATTORNEY LIKE 50 TIMES. 8 00:00:15,383 --> 00:00:16,648 HE DIDN'T CALL ME BACK. 9 00:00:16,650 --> 00:00:17,850 - OH, DO YOU NEED A LAWYER? 10 00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:18,917 BECAUSE MY FRIEND JUSTIN'S A LAWYER. 11 00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:19,918 I'M SURE HE COULD HELP. 12 00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:20,919 - OH, THAT'D BE TERRIFIC. 13 00:00:20,921 --> 00:00:21,920 - YEAH, I'LL CALL HIM. 14 00:00:21,922 --> 00:00:23,956 JUSTIN'S THE GREATEST GUY EVER. 15 00:00:23,958 --> 00:00:26,392 - [chuckling] THE GREATEST GUY EVER? 16 00:00:26,394 --> 00:00:29,228 - BUT DOES HE DRESS... THIS WELL? 17 00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:30,396 BROOKS BROTHERS. 18 00:00:30,398 --> 00:00:31,897 BOUGHT IT RIGHT OFF THE MANNEQUIN. 19 00:00:34,434 --> 00:00:36,335 - RON SWANSON? 20 00:00:37,170 --> 00:00:38,270 - THAT'S ME. 21 00:00:38,272 --> 00:00:39,538 - MY NAME IS GEORGE MACFAYDEN. 22 00:00:39,540 --> 00:00:42,074 I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THE AMOUNT OF SNOW 23 00:00:42,076 --> 00:00:43,575 IN THE PARKS. 24 00:00:43,577 --> 00:00:46,412 - I'VE BEEN GETTING A LOT OF VISITORS RECENTLY, 25 00:00:46,414 --> 00:00:50,883 THANKS TO A STUPID, WORTHLESS, NEW PUSH 26 00:00:50,885 --> 00:00:53,552 TO MAKE GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS MORE ACCESSIBLE 27 00:00:53,554 --> 00:00:55,287 TO THE PUBLIC. 28 00:00:55,289 --> 00:00:58,457 - THERE IS A DISTURBING LACK OF BENCHES IN RAMSETT PARK! 29 00:00:58,459 --> 00:00:59,792 I WANT TO SIT MORE! 30 00:00:59,794 --> 00:01:03,295 - AND ANOTHER THING I LIKE 31 00:01:03,297 --> 00:01:07,366 IS THE LAYOUT OF THE HIKING TRAILS. 32 00:01:07,368 --> 00:01:09,535 - I MADE THIS IN ONE OF YOUR POTTERY CLASSES. 33 00:01:09,537 --> 00:01:12,004 IT'S TERRIBLE! 34 00:01:12,006 --> 00:01:13,839 - THIS IS MY HELL. 35 00:01:13,841 --> 00:01:16,842 [triumphant music] 36 00:01:16,844 --> 00:01:24,917 ♪ ♪ 37 00:01:44,237 --> 00:01:45,237 - HEY. 38 00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:46,538 - HEY! 39 00:01:46,540 --> 00:01:47,940 - ALL RIGHT, SO TOM, 40 00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:49,608 HERE'S YOUR CHICKEN CAESAR SALAD, 41 00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:53,011 NO DRESSING, NO CHEESE, NO CROUTONS, NO TASTE. 42 00:01:53,013 --> 00:01:54,446 - AND NO CARBS. 43 00:01:55,081 --> 00:01:57,282 - AND FOR YOU, MADAME, 44 00:01:57,284 --> 00:01:59,284 THE LESLIE KNOPE. - THANK YOU. 45 00:01:59,286 --> 00:02:01,353 - I CANNOT BELIEVE THE CAFETERIA NAMED A SANDWICH AFTER YOU. 46 00:02:01,355 --> 00:02:02,754 THAT IS SO COOL. - ISN'T IT? 47 00:02:02,756 --> 00:02:04,423 SALAMI ON PUMPERNICKEL 48 00:02:04,425 --> 00:02:07,960 WITH OLIVE JUICE AND EXTRA ICEBERG. 49 00:02:07,962 --> 00:02:09,795 IT WAS THE ONLY SANDWICH ON THE BOARD THAT WASN'T NAMED. 50 00:02:09,797 --> 00:02:11,797 I JUST WISH I LIKED IT. 51 00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:14,433 - SO HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT THE WHOLE DAVE SITUATION? 52 00:02:14,435 --> 00:02:16,101 - OH, I REALLY MISS HIM. 53 00:02:16,103 --> 00:02:18,637 YEAH, I'M JUST TRYING TO ENJOY THE MEMORIES. 54 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:19,838 - AWW, THAT'S A SWEET PICTURE. 55 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:21,140 - I KNOW, ISN'T IT? 56 00:02:21,142 --> 00:02:22,741 I ASKED THE POLICE DEPARTMENT IF I COULD HAVE IT, 57 00:02:22,743 --> 00:02:24,576 AND THEY SAID NO, SO I STOLE IT. 58 00:02:24,578 --> 00:02:27,346 - I HAVE AN IDEA. WHY DON'T YOU LET ME SET YOU UP? 59 00:02:27,348 --> 00:02:29,381 - OH, I DON'T KNOW. IT FEELS A LITTLE TOO SOON. 60 00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:31,750 - I'M TELLING YOU, THIS IS THE BEST WAY TO GET OVER SOMEONE, 61 00:02:31,752 --> 00:02:33,785 JUST GET BACK ON THAT HORSE. 62 00:02:33,787 --> 00:02:35,721 - YEAH, MAYBE. 63 00:02:36,289 --> 00:02:38,090 - I FEEL SORRY FOR LESLIE. 64 00:02:38,092 --> 00:02:39,658 IT'S REALLY HARD TO END A RELATIONSHIP 65 00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:41,093 BECAUSE OF DISTANCE. 66 00:02:41,095 --> 00:02:43,896 ALTHOUGH THAT'S PRETTY MUCH WHY I BROKE UP WITH ANDY. 67 00:02:43,898 --> 00:02:47,099 HE LIVED WAY TOO CLOSE TO ME. 68 00:02:47,101 --> 00:02:49,368 - WOW, 12:15. YOU'RE EARLY TODAY. 69 00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:51,904 - APRIL, THERE'S NO PAPER IN THE PRINTER. 70 00:02:51,906 --> 00:02:53,438 - SO? 71 00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:55,641 - SO THAT'S THE ONE THING YOU DO. 72 00:02:56,543 --> 00:02:57,776 - [sighs] 73 00:03:04,784 --> 00:03:05,951 - ATTENTION. 74 00:03:05,953 --> 00:03:07,686 APRIL, STOP DOING THAT. 75 00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:10,189 - JERRY TOLD ME TO, SO IT'S SUPER CRUCIAL. 76 00:03:10,191 --> 00:03:11,623 - MORE IMPORTANT THAN THAT, 77 00:03:11,625 --> 00:03:15,027 AND MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING IN THIS GOD-FORSAKEN WORLD 78 00:03:15,029 --> 00:03:16,662 IS FINDING ME AN ASSISTANT. 79 00:03:16,664 --> 00:03:18,764 - YOU GET AN ASSISTANT NOW? 80 00:03:18,766 --> 00:03:20,232 - YEAH, I'VE ALWAYS BEEN ABLE TO HAVE ONE, 81 00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:22,000 BUT I'VE TURNED IT DOWN CAUSE IT'S A WASTE OF MONEY. 82 00:03:22,002 --> 00:03:23,535 IN THE EIGHT YEARS I'VE BEEN AT THE JOB, 83 00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:25,103 I'VE SAVED THE TAXPAYERS OF THIS CITY 84 00:03:25,105 --> 00:03:27,239 MORE THAN 150 GRAND. 85 00:03:27,241 --> 00:03:30,075 BUT NOW, I NEED THE TAXPAYERS' MONEY 86 00:03:30,077 --> 00:03:32,844 TO SAVE ME FROM THE TAXPAYERS. 87 00:03:32,846 --> 00:03:35,647 POST THIS AT YOUR COLLEGE. 88 00:03:36,816 --> 00:03:39,518 - THIS LOOKS LIKE AN AD FOR NOTHING. 89 00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:40,852 - PLEASE BE CAREFUL WITH IT. 90 00:03:40,854 --> 00:03:42,054 IT'S MY ONLY COPY. 91 00:03:43,022 --> 00:03:44,122 [knock on door] 92 00:03:44,124 --> 00:03:45,991 - LESLIE. 93 00:03:45,993 --> 00:03:47,326 ANN'S FRIEND, JUSTIN. 94 00:03:47,328 --> 00:03:48,860 - OH, HEY, YEAH. OF COURSE. HI. 95 00:03:48,862 --> 00:03:50,329 THANK YOU. THANK YOU FOR COMING IN. 96 00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:51,396 - MY PLEASURE. NOT A PROBLEM. 97 00:03:51,398 --> 00:03:53,432 - HAVE A SEAT. - I SHOULD WARN YOU, 98 00:03:53,434 --> 00:03:55,267 LAND SEIZURE ISN'T REALLY MY SPECIALTY, 99 00:03:55,269 --> 00:03:56,568 BUT I'M GONNA HAVE TO TAKE A LOOK. 100 00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,003 ANY FRIEND OF ANN'S... - IS A FRIEND OF MINE. 101 00:03:58,005 --> 00:03:59,204 THAT'S MY MOTTO TOO. 102 00:03:59,206 --> 00:04:00,405 - HMM. [both chuckle] 103 00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:02,474 - SO, UM, WHAT IS YOUR SPECIALTY? 104 00:04:02,476 --> 00:04:04,076 IS IT LOCKING UP THE BAD GUYS, 105 00:04:04,078 --> 00:04:06,878 OR KEEPING THEM ON THE STREETS? - UM, NEITHER. 106 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:08,747 IT'S CIVIL LITIGATION, MOSTLY. - THAT'S INTERESTING. 107 00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,983 - CAN BE...I'VE GOT THIS CRAZY CASE RIGHT NOW. 108 00:04:10,985 --> 00:04:13,852 HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF THIS PRODUCT, FIRE IN A CAN? 109 00:04:13,854 --> 00:04:15,220 - OH, I LOVE THOSE COMMERCIALS! 110 00:04:15,222 --> 00:04:16,688 ♪ IF YOU WANNA START A FIRE ♪ 111 00:04:16,690 --> 00:04:18,023 ♪ BUT YOU HAVE TO DO IT FAST, THEN-- ♪ 112 00:04:18,025 --> 00:04:19,258 - WELL, YOU SHOULDN'T BUY IT. 113 00:04:19,260 --> 00:04:21,460 IT WILL LITERALLY BURN YOUR HAND CLEAN OFF. 114 00:04:21,462 --> 00:04:23,262 - OH, WOW. - MM-HMM. 115 00:04:23,264 --> 00:04:26,765 IT IS AN AEROSOL CAN WITH AN IGNITER AND A TRIGGER. 116 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:29,101 IT'S ESSENTIALLY A BLOW TORCH. 117 00:04:29,103 --> 00:04:30,802 AND, IF YOU CAN BELIEVE IT, 118 00:04:30,804 --> 00:04:33,872 IT WAS INVENTED TO WARM UP BABY BOTTLES. 119 00:04:33,874 --> 00:04:36,074 - THIS IS MY COLLEAGUE, TOM HAVERFORD. 120 00:04:36,076 --> 00:04:37,809 - TOM, JUSTIN. - HOW ARE YOU? 121 00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:40,078 YOU ARE WEARING THE HELL OUT OF THAT SUIT, SIR. 122 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:41,513 BANANA TWO-BUTTON. 123 00:04:41,515 --> 00:04:42,514 - OKAY, LET'S GO INTO THE CONFERENCE ROOM. 124 00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:43,515 I GOT EVERYTHING LAID OUT. 125 00:04:43,517 --> 00:04:44,883 - WE SHOULD TALK LATER. - TOM, STOP. 126 00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:46,852 - YOU ARE VERY ORGANIZED, LESLIE. 127 00:04:46,854 --> 00:04:48,453 - YEAH, I AM. 128 00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:49,755 THANK YOU. 129 00:04:49,757 --> 00:04:51,657 - I LOVE WHAT YOU DO. YOU GOT THE COOLEST JOB. 130 00:04:51,659 --> 00:04:53,659 LET ME GUESS. THIS IS OUR PARK. 131 00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:55,327 I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS. 132 00:04:55,329 --> 00:04:56,695 - OH, OKAY. 133 00:04:56,697 --> 00:04:58,563 WELL, THESE GREEN THINGS REPRESENT TREES. 134 00:04:58,565 --> 00:05:00,832 - I COME IN, LIKE, TWO HOURS LATE 135 00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:02,801 BECAUSE I HAD TO FINISH WATCHING SWIMFAN 136 00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:04,469 BECAUSE IT WAS...ON. 137 00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:06,538 AND EVERYONE, LIKE, JUMPED DOWN MY THROAT. 138 00:05:06,540 --> 00:05:07,806 - OH, MAN. 139 00:05:07,808 --> 00:05:09,474 - CAN'T WAIT TILL MY INTERNSHIP IS OVER, 140 00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:11,076 SO I CAN GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE. 141 00:05:11,078 --> 00:05:13,912 - WELL, YOU'RE ALL SET. 142 00:05:13,914 --> 00:05:16,281 FREE OF CHARGE, OF COURSE. 143 00:05:16,283 --> 00:05:19,017 - HEY, WHY DON'T YOU SELL YOUR BAND'S CDs HERE? 144 00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:20,719 - THAT IS A BRILLIANT IDEA. 145 00:05:20,721 --> 00:05:22,921 I CANNOT BELIEVE I DIDN'T THINK OF THAT. 146 00:05:22,923 --> 00:05:24,890 I HAVE BEEN WRITING A LOT OF SONGS 147 00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:27,059 ABOUT SHINING SHOES LATELY. 148 00:05:27,061 --> 00:05:29,528 I TEND TO WRITE ABOUT WHAT I'M DOING. 149 00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:31,630 ♪ TALKIN' 'BOUT ♪ 150 00:05:31,632 --> 00:05:35,600 ♪ WRITIN' ABOUT WHAT I'M DOIN' ♪ 151 00:05:35,602 --> 00:05:39,004 ♪ NOW I'M SINGIN' ABOUT TALKIN' ABOUT ♪ 152 00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:42,274 ♪ WRITIN' ABOUT WHAT I'M DOIN' ♪ 153 00:05:42,276 --> 00:05:43,608 - OF COURSE I'M GONNA HAVE TO TAKE A CLOSER LOOK 154 00:05:43,610 --> 00:05:44,876 AT THESE THINGS, BUT MY GUT'S TELLING ME 155 00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:46,378 THIS IS NOT GONNA BE A BIG DEAL. 156 00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:48,347 YOU KNOW, COMPANIES MAKE BOGUS CLAIMS LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME. 157 00:05:48,349 --> 00:05:49,715 I THINK YOU'RE GONNA BE JUST FINE. 158 00:05:49,717 --> 00:05:51,983 - THANK YOU SO MUCH. I KNOW YOU'RE REALLY BUSY. 159 00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:53,118 - PLEASE, IT'S MY PLEASURE. 160 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:55,754 LEAST THIS STUFF IS INTERESTING, YOU KNOW. 161 00:05:55,756 --> 00:05:57,122 YOU KNOW, IT ACTUALLY REMINDS ME-- 162 00:05:57,124 --> 00:06:00,459 TWO YEARS AGO I WAS IN BORNEO, OFFICIATING A WEDDING, 163 00:06:00,461 --> 00:06:03,028 AND THIS ENORMOUS MEDICINE MAN SHOWED UP, 164 00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:05,163 AND HE WAS THERE TO BASICALLY TELL-- 165 00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:06,631 - JUSTIN! - HEY, KIDDO. 166 00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:08,266 - HEY. - HOW YOU DOIN'? 167 00:06:08,268 --> 00:06:09,935 - I'M GOOD. I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN FOREVER. 168 00:06:09,937 --> 00:06:11,370 - I KNOW, SO GOOD TO SEE YOU. 169 00:06:11,372 --> 00:06:12,504 - YOU TOO. DO YOU WANT TO GRAB SOME DINNER? 170 00:06:12,506 --> 00:06:14,039 - UH, I WOULD LOVE TO. 171 00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:15,774 I CANNOT. I AM SWAMPED. 172 00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:16,842 - YOU'RE ALWAYS SO BUSY. 173 00:06:16,844 --> 00:06:18,543 - YEAH. NEXT WEEK, I PROMISE. 174 00:06:18,545 --> 00:06:20,145 - OKAY. - HEY, I'M MARK. 175 00:06:20,147 --> 00:06:22,714 - OH! SORRY. JUSTIN, THIS IS MARK. 176 00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:24,750 THIS IS THE CITY PLANNER. - OH, MY GOD. 177 00:06:24,752 --> 00:06:26,084 IT'S SUCH A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU. 178 00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,753 - UH, PLEASURE. - PLEASURE. 179 00:06:29,555 --> 00:06:31,256 ANYWAY, LESLIE, I HAVE TO GO. 180 00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:33,058 IT HAS BEEN A SUPER PLEASURE MEETING YOU. 181 00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:34,393 I AM GONNA GET INTO THIS OVER THE WEEKEND, 182 00:06:34,395 --> 00:06:36,595 AND I WILL GET BACK TO YOU ON MONDAY ABOUT IT. 183 00:06:36,597 --> 00:06:37,863 - OKAY, GREAT. - ALL RIGHT. 184 00:06:37,865 --> 00:06:39,464 - SEE YOU, JUSTIN. - HEY, TOM, GOOD SEEING YOU. 185 00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:41,133 - I'VE BEEN THINKING. 186 00:06:41,135 --> 00:06:44,035 IT HAS BEEN A WHILE SINCE DAVE LEFT. 187 00:06:44,037 --> 00:06:45,804 AND I THINK I MIGHT BE READY TO START DATING AGAIN. 188 00:06:45,806 --> 00:06:47,172 - THAT'S GREAT! 189 00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:49,341 - YOU KNOW, I WAS ONLY WITH MARK FOR ONE NIGHT, 190 00:06:49,343 --> 00:06:52,677 AND THEN I WAS HUNG UP ON HIM FOR SIX YEARS. 191 00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:55,347 I DATED DAVE FOR THREE MONTHS. 192 00:06:55,349 --> 00:06:57,349 SO IF I CONTINUE THAT PATTERN, 193 00:06:57,351 --> 00:07:00,018 I WON'T BE OVER HIM FOR... 194 00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:03,221 500 YEARS. 195 00:07:03,223 --> 00:07:04,623 - WHAT IS YOUR IDEAL MAN? 196 00:07:04,625 --> 00:07:06,758 - HE HAS THE BRAINS OF GEORGE CLOONEY 197 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,627 IN THE BODY OF JOE BIDEN. 198 00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:10,429 - INTERESTING. 199 00:07:10,431 --> 00:07:12,631 THAT'S A HIGH, WEIRD BAR. 200 00:07:12,633 --> 00:07:14,232 OKAY, JUST OFF THE BAT, 201 00:07:14,234 --> 00:07:17,002 THERE IS A COUPLE OF DOCTORS I THINK YOU WOULD LOVE. 202 00:07:17,004 --> 00:07:20,872 - ACTUALLY, I WAS THINKING, WHAT ABOUT JUSTIN? 203 00:07:20,874 --> 00:07:23,241 MEAN, I FEEL LIKE WE KIND OF HIT IT OFF IN THERE. 204 00:07:23,243 --> 00:07:25,076 - NO, I DON'T-- 205 00:07:25,078 --> 00:07:27,179 I JUST DON'T KNOW IF THAT WOULD BE THE RIGHT-- 206 00:07:27,181 --> 00:07:28,513 - NO? - NO. 207 00:07:28,515 --> 00:07:29,714 - WHY, IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH HIM? 208 00:07:29,716 --> 00:07:30,882 - NO, NO, HE'S GREAT. 209 00:07:30,884 --> 00:07:32,717 HE'S REALLY, REALLY, REALLY GREAT. 210 00:07:32,719 --> 00:07:34,453 AND YOU'RE SO GREAT, OBVIOUSLY. 211 00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:36,621 I JUST-- I DON'T KNOW. 212 00:07:36,623 --> 00:07:38,590 IT'S HARD--I CAN'T-- I CAN'T-- 213 00:07:38,592 --> 00:07:40,425 - WHAT IS IT THOUGH? - I DON'T KNOW. 214 00:07:40,427 --> 00:07:41,726 IT'S JUST I DON'T THINK IT WOULD BE-- 215 00:07:41,728 --> 00:07:43,428 - I THINK IT WOULD. NO? 216 00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:44,729 - NO, I REALLY DON'T. I'M SORRY, I DON'T-- 217 00:07:44,731 --> 00:07:46,031 - DON'T BE SORRY. 218 00:07:46,033 --> 00:07:47,732 I MEAN, IF YOU THINK IT WASN'T GONNA WORK OR-- 219 00:07:47,734 --> 00:07:49,167 - BUT I WILL FIND YOU SOMEONE. I PROMISE. 220 00:07:49,169 --> 00:07:50,268 AND HE'LL BE AWESOME. 221 00:07:50,270 --> 00:07:51,269 I'M GONNA DO IT RIGHT NOW. 222 00:07:51,271 --> 00:07:52,571 - GOOD, GREAT. YES! 223 00:07:52,573 --> 00:07:54,339 GO, ANN, GO! OH, JUST ONE RULE. 224 00:07:54,341 --> 00:07:56,041 I DON'T WANT TO DATE A TWIN. 225 00:07:56,043 --> 00:07:58,543 'CAUSE I'VE BEEN TRICKED BEFORE. 226 00:07:58,545 --> 00:07:59,978 - OKAY. 227 00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:03,415 - YES, I UNDERSTAND YOUR COMPLAINT. 228 00:08:03,417 --> 00:08:05,217 I HAVE TO GO NOW. 229 00:08:05,219 --> 00:08:07,552 PLEASE. THANK YOU. 230 00:08:07,554 --> 00:08:09,588 - RON SOLO. - HELLO, TOM. 231 00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:11,623 [phone rings] 232 00:08:13,593 --> 00:08:14,793 [ringing stops] 233 00:08:17,196 --> 00:08:18,497 - OKAY. 234 00:08:18,499 --> 00:08:20,465 I WANT TO HELP YOU WITH YOUR ASSISTANT SEARCH. 235 00:08:20,467 --> 00:08:21,733 - WHY? 236 00:08:21,735 --> 00:08:22,901 - 'CAUSE I WAN TO DO MY BOY RON A SOLID. 237 00:08:22,903 --> 00:08:24,269 I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR, 238 00:08:24,271 --> 00:08:26,938 AND I WILL FIND YOU A RELIABLE PERSON. 239 00:08:26,940 --> 00:08:28,273 - OKAY, SOUNDS GOOD. 240 00:08:28,275 --> 00:08:30,475 [cell phone rings] 241 00:08:33,279 --> 00:08:35,347 [ringing stops] 242 00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:42,554 - HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT WAS A MEMBER OF THE PUBLIC 243 00:08:42,556 --> 00:08:44,089 AND NOT JUST A FRIEND? 244 00:08:44,091 --> 00:08:47,826 - MY FRIENDS KNOW THAT I HAVE A STRICT NO-CALL POLICY. 245 00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:51,496 NOW, GET OUT THERE AND FIND ME AN ASSISTANT. 246 00:08:51,498 --> 00:08:52,697 - I LEFT YOU THREE MESSAGES. DID YOU GET THEM? 247 00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:53,832 - NO, I'VE BEEN RUNNING AROUND ALL DAY. 248 00:08:53,834 --> 00:08:55,100 WHAT'S UP? 249 00:08:55,102 --> 00:08:56,935 - I FOUND THE PERFECT GUY TO SET YOU UP WITH. 250 00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:58,970 BUT HE'S GOING OUT OF TOWN, SO HE CAN ONLY DO TONIGHT. 251 00:08:58,972 --> 00:09:01,439 SO I CAME OVER HERE RIGHT AFTER WORK. 252 00:09:01,441 --> 00:09:02,974 - IS THAT HIS BLOOD? - WHAT? 253 00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:05,110 OH, DAMN. NOW I HAVE TO GO BACK. 254 00:09:05,112 --> 00:09:06,912 - WHO IS HE? - HIS NAME IS CHRIS, 255 00:09:06,914 --> 00:09:08,580 AND HE'S AN MRI TECHNICIAN. 256 00:09:08,582 --> 00:09:10,448 AND HE'S REALLY CUTE AND HE'S VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT HIS JOB. 257 00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:12,918 AND I TOLD HIM ALL ABOUT YOU AND HE'S REALLY INTERESTED. 258 00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:15,854 SO DINNER TONIGHT, AND HERE'S THE INFO. 259 00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:17,956 - THANKS. WAIT! 260 00:09:17,958 --> 00:09:19,291 HOW IS HE GONNA KNOW IT'S ME? 261 00:09:19,293 --> 00:09:21,226 I'LL WEAR A RED ROSE IN MY HAIR. 262 00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:22,761 NO, I'LL WEAR A GIANT, RED HAT. 263 00:09:22,763 --> 00:09:24,195 NO, I DON'T HAVE ONE OF THOSE. WHAT SHOULD I WEAR? 264 00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:25,430 IT'S GOTTA BE RED. 265 00:09:25,432 --> 00:09:27,198 - I WILL JUST TELL HIM WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE. 266 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:28,300 - GOOD CALL. 267 00:09:28,302 --> 00:09:29,367 [light piano music] 268 00:09:29,369 --> 00:09:30,735 - HI, I'M LESLIE. 269 00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:32,103 ARE YOU CHRIS? - YEAH. 270 00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:34,873 - SORRY I'M LATE. - OH, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. 271 00:09:34,875 --> 00:09:37,409 YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL. - THANK YOU. 272 00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:38,443 - OH, HERE, LET ME TAKE YOUR COAT. 273 00:09:38,445 --> 00:09:40,278 - OH, THANKS. - SURE. 274 00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:42,948 - [whispering] WELL DONE, ANN. 275 00:09:42,950 --> 00:09:44,649 - I ACTUALLY HEARD THAT. - WHAT? 276 00:09:46,819 --> 00:09:49,454 - WELL, I WENT TO WISCONSIN FOR BOTH UNDERGRAD 277 00:09:49,456 --> 00:09:50,722 AND GRAD SCHOOL. 278 00:09:50,724 --> 00:09:53,425 GO, BADGERS. - BOO. INDIANA HOOSIERS. 279 00:09:53,427 --> 00:09:55,460 - NO, BADGERS. 280 00:09:55,462 --> 00:09:56,528 - OH. 281 00:09:56,996 --> 00:09:58,229 IT'S NOT IMPORTANT. 282 00:09:58,231 --> 00:10:01,499 I'M JUST GLAD THAT WE COULD MAKE THIS HAPPEN. 283 00:10:01,501 --> 00:10:03,201 - ANN KEPT GOING ON ABOUT HOW WONDERFUL YOU ARE, 284 00:10:03,203 --> 00:10:05,604 AND I JUST HAD TO SEE FOR MYSELF. 285 00:10:05,606 --> 00:10:07,238 - WELL, SHE'S MY NUMBER ONE BEST FRIEND. 286 00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:08,673 - KIND OF WISH SHE'D TOLD ME THAT YOU WENT TO INDIANA, 287 00:10:08,675 --> 00:10:10,275 BUT WHATEVER. 288 00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:12,310 SO YOU'RE IN CHARGE OF AMUSEMENT PARKS, RIGHT? 289 00:10:12,312 --> 00:10:13,712 GOD, THAT'S EXCITING. 290 00:10:13,714 --> 00:10:15,780 - ACTUALLY, IT'S REGULAR PARKS. 291 00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:17,482 LIKE SWINGS AND SLIDES AND STUFF. 292 00:10:17,484 --> 00:10:18,984 - STRIKE TWO. 293 00:10:20,753 --> 00:10:22,320 - YOU KNOW, ISN'T IT FUNNY 294 00:10:22,322 --> 00:10:24,656 HOW THESE SETUPS ARE ALWAYS JUST SO AWKWARD? 295 00:10:24,658 --> 00:10:26,491 - WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT? 296 00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:28,393 - UH... 297 00:10:28,395 --> 00:10:30,528 I DON'T-- I DON'T KNOW. 298 00:10:30,530 --> 00:10:33,231 THEY'RE NOT. FORGET IT. 299 00:10:34,033 --> 00:10:35,700 - GOD, WAY TO GO, CHRIS. 300 00:10:35,702 --> 00:10:38,069 DID I JUST MAKE IT AWKWARD? 301 00:10:38,071 --> 00:10:40,372 - NO, NO, YOU DIDN'T. 302 00:10:41,841 --> 00:10:44,676 WELL, YEAH, YOU KINDA DID. 303 00:10:44,678 --> 00:10:46,411 - [chuckles] 304 00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:48,313 - LET'S JUST START FROM THE BEGINNING, I GUESS. 305 00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:49,814 - HEY, WATCH THIS. 306 00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,350 I WILL NOW EXTINGUISH THIS CANDLE 307 00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:53,585 WITH MY BARE HANDS. 308 00:10:53,587 --> 00:10:55,453 - OKAY. 309 00:10:56,722 --> 00:10:59,491 - GAH, [bleep]! UHH! 310 00:10:59,493 --> 00:11:01,493 THAT REALLY HURTS. - ARE YOU OKAY? 311 00:11:01,495 --> 00:11:04,195 - OH, GOD, IT LOOKED SO MUCH EASIER ON THE INTERNET. 312 00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:06,264 GOD, I GOTTA BORROW SOME OF YOUR ICE. 313 00:11:06,266 --> 00:11:08,199 [exhales] 314 00:11:12,772 --> 00:11:14,673 OH, NO, THANKS, I'M NOT THIRSTY. 315 00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,143 - WHAT, THE GERMAN? 316 00:11:18,145 --> 00:11:20,679 [laughing] OH, MY GOD. 317 00:11:20,681 --> 00:11:23,014 ALL RIGHT, LATER. 318 00:11:23,649 --> 00:11:24,949 - WHO WAS THAT, JUSTIN? 319 00:11:24,951 --> 00:11:26,584 - YEAH. WE'RE HAVING LUNCH TOMORROW. 320 00:11:26,586 --> 00:11:29,087 - OH, GET OUT. HOW LONG HAVE YOU KNOWN HIM? 321 00:11:29,089 --> 00:11:30,922 - OH, FOREVER. 322 00:11:30,924 --> 00:11:32,490 HE PRACTICALLY SAVED MY LIFE. 323 00:11:32,492 --> 00:11:34,893 HE WAS, LIKE, THE ONLY COOL DUDE AT MY HIGH SCHOOL. 324 00:11:34,895 --> 00:11:36,361 - AWESOME. 325 00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:37,996 DID YOU GUYS EVER DATE? 326 00:11:37,998 --> 00:11:39,497 - NO, WE NEVER DID. 327 00:11:39,499 --> 00:11:41,066 HE'S JUST LIKE... 328 00:11:41,068 --> 00:11:42,967 A REALLY AMAZING PERSON. 329 00:11:44,637 --> 00:11:46,638 LET'S DO THIS! MARLEY and ME. 330 00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:48,239 PUPPIES! PUPPIES, PUPPIES. 331 00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:49,474 - [laughing] I KNOW. 332 00:11:49,476 --> 00:11:52,944 LET'S...WATCH MARLEY and ME. 333 00:11:55,181 --> 00:11:56,314 - BRIAN. 334 00:11:59,151 --> 00:12:00,752 TECHNICALLY, YOU'D BE ASSISTING RON. 335 00:12:00,754 --> 00:12:03,521 BUT RON REALLY DOESN'T DO MUCH GOVERNMENT WORK, 336 00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:05,957 SO YOU'D REALLY BE WORKING FOR ME. 337 00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:08,359 I SEE YOUR RESUME HERE. EDUCATION, EXCELLENT. 338 00:12:08,361 --> 00:12:09,994 AWESOME PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE, 339 00:12:09,996 --> 00:12:11,896 BUT I DON'T CARE. 340 00:12:13,099 --> 00:12:16,668 I'M INTERESTED IN REAL WORLD EXPERTISE. 341 00:12:16,670 --> 00:12:19,537 I GOT A NIGHTCLUB OPENING TO GO TO. 342 00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:21,439 WHICH TIE DO I WEAR? 343 00:12:21,441 --> 00:12:22,874 - I LIKE THE ONE ON THE LEFT. 344 00:12:22,876 --> 00:12:25,210 - THAT WAS A TRICK QUESTION. 345 00:12:25,212 --> 00:12:27,045 THE ANSWER IS THIS ONE. 346 00:12:27,047 --> 00:12:28,313 - DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THAT ONE EXISTED. 347 00:12:28,315 --> 00:12:31,082 - I HAD HIGH HOPES WHEN I SAW YOUR PLUM V-NECK. 348 00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:32,884 BUT THOSE HOPES HAVE BEEN DASHED. 349 00:12:32,886 --> 00:12:34,519 YOU CAN LEAVE. 350 00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:37,222 - DID YOU EVER SEE THAT MOVIE, THE MATRIX? 351 00:12:37,224 --> 00:12:38,022 - YEAH. 352 00:12:38,024 --> 00:12:39,991 - 99% REAL. 353 00:12:39,993 --> 00:12:41,626 - SO DO YOU ENJOY IT, 354 00:12:41,628 --> 00:12:43,361 BEING AN MRI TECHNICIAN? 355 00:12:43,363 --> 00:12:44,829 - GREAT QUESTION. 356 00:12:44,831 --> 00:12:46,765 SOMEONE STEPS INTO THE ROOM. 357 00:12:46,767 --> 00:12:49,801 IMAGINE A MOTHER OF THREE. MAYBE SHE'S A TEACHER. 358 00:12:49,803 --> 00:12:52,837 SHE KNOWS SOMETHING'S WRONG, BUT SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS. 359 00:12:52,839 --> 00:12:54,439 SHE'S SCARED. 360 00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:57,041 IN LESS THAN AN HOUR, I KNOW WHAT IT IS. 361 00:12:57,043 --> 00:12:58,042 - WHAT'S WRONG WITH HER? 362 00:12:58,044 --> 00:12:59,377 - I DON'T KNOW. 363 00:12:59,379 --> 00:13:02,514 BUT THE BEST PART ABOUT BEING AN MRI TECHNICIAN IS... 364 00:13:02,516 --> 00:13:05,016 I CAN SEE INSIDE EVERYTHING. 365 00:13:05,018 --> 00:13:06,651 SEE THAT GUY OVER THERE? 366 00:13:06,653 --> 00:13:10,021 IMAGINE BEING ABLE TO LOOK INSIDE HIS HEAD. 367 00:13:10,023 --> 00:13:11,456 - WOW. - I KNOW. 368 00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:14,425 I MEAN, YOU COULD JUST LOOK INSIDE THE STEAK 369 00:13:14,427 --> 00:13:16,194 OR YOU COULD LOOK INSIDE THIS BUTTER 370 00:13:16,196 --> 00:13:18,029 OR THESE POTATOES OR THIS CANDLE 371 00:13:18,031 --> 00:13:19,798 OR THIS BEER OR THIS FLOWER 372 00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,266 OR THIS BREAD. 373 00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:23,701 YOU CAN LOOK INSIDE ANYTHING. 374 00:13:23,703 --> 00:13:25,203 - WELL, IF YOU LOOK INSIDE THIS BREAD, 375 00:13:25,205 --> 00:13:26,571 ALL YOU'RE GONNA FIND IS MORE BREAD. 376 00:13:26,573 --> 00:13:28,807 - I DON'T KNOW. I'D HAVE TO DO AN MRI. 377 00:13:28,809 --> 00:13:30,208 - LOOK. 378 00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,211 THERE'S JUST BREAD IN THERE. 379 00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:35,113 - YEAH, BUT WHAT'S INSIDE THAT BREAD? 380 00:13:35,115 --> 00:13:36,347 COULD BE CHEESE. 381 00:13:37,349 --> 00:13:39,384 - ANYWAY, IT'S GOOD THAT YOU FOUND YOUR CALLING. 382 00:13:39,386 --> 00:13:42,187 I MEAN, I'VE NEVER EVEN HAD AN MRI BEFORE. 383 00:13:42,189 --> 00:13:44,122 [sets down fork] - WHAT? 384 00:13:46,192 --> 00:13:48,293 - I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS. 385 00:13:48,295 --> 00:13:51,095 - WELL, I'M OFFERING YOU A FREE SCAN. 386 00:13:51,097 --> 00:13:53,231 USUALLY COSTS UP TO $2,000. 387 00:13:53,233 --> 00:13:55,033 I'M KIND OF SPOILING YOU HERE. 388 00:13:55,035 --> 00:13:58,169 - WELL, I AM A LITTLE CURIOUS. 389 00:13:58,171 --> 00:13:59,671 - GOOD. 390 00:13:59,673 --> 00:14:01,039 'CAUSE, FRANKLY, I DON'T WANT TO INVEST IN SOMEONE 391 00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:02,340 WHO ONLY HAS THREE MONTHS TO LIVE. 392 00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:04,108 - [laughs] 393 00:14:05,411 --> 00:14:06,811 OH. 394 00:14:06,813 --> 00:14:08,079 - I'M TREATING THIS AS AN ADVENTURE. 395 00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:10,315 WHO KNOWS, MAYBE SOMEDAY WE'LL TELL OUR GRANDKIDS 396 00:14:10,317 --> 00:14:12,317 ABOUT HOW WEIRD OR FIRST DATE WAS 397 00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:15,620 AND HOW CREEPY THEIR GRANDFATHER WAS. 398 00:14:16,822 --> 00:14:18,289 - TRY NOT TO SMILE TOO MUCH. 399 00:14:18,291 --> 00:14:20,225 IT'LL AFFECT THE DIAGNOSIS. 400 00:14:20,227 --> 00:14:23,061 - WELL, HOPEFULLY THERE'LL BE NOTHING TO DIAGNOSE. 401 00:14:23,063 --> 00:14:26,397 - SOMETIMES SMILING IS READ AS AIDS. 402 00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:29,067 OH, YOU'RE NOT ON YOUR PERIOD, ARE YOU? 403 00:14:29,069 --> 00:14:31,102 - NO. DOES THAT MATTER? 404 00:14:31,104 --> 00:14:32,670 - WELL, NOT FOR THIS. 405 00:14:33,772 --> 00:14:36,241 OKAY, IT'S GONNA BE A LITTLE CRAMMED IN THERE. 406 00:14:36,243 --> 00:14:38,009 DON'T WORRY, I'LL BE RIGHT ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THAT GLASS. 407 00:14:38,011 --> 00:14:40,178 [machine whirring] 408 00:14:41,614 --> 00:14:44,315 - SCENARIO: I MEET A GIRL AT A BAR. 409 00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:46,251 SHE SEEMS KIND OF INTO ME. COULD GO EITHER WAY. 410 00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:47,552 I GET HER NUMBER. IT'S TWO DAYS LATER. 411 00:14:47,554 --> 00:14:48,586 WHAT DO I TEXT HER? 412 00:14:48,588 --> 00:14:50,488 - IT WAS NICE MEETING YOU? 413 00:14:50,490 --> 00:14:51,789 - NO, ZACK! 414 00:14:51,791 --> 00:14:53,157 I DON'T TEXT HER, "IT WAS NICE MEETING YOU." 415 00:14:53,159 --> 00:14:54,292 I WAIT EIGHT WEEKS, 416 00:14:54,294 --> 00:14:57,061 AND I TEXT HER, "WHAT'S CRACKIN'?" 417 00:14:57,063 --> 00:14:58,630 - YOUR RESUME'S VERY IMPRESSIVE, 418 00:14:58,632 --> 00:14:59,964 BUT TELL ME ABOUT YOU. 419 00:14:59,966 --> 00:15:01,466 TELL ME ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS. 420 00:15:01,468 --> 00:15:04,168 BE AS SUPERFICIAL AS POSSIBLE. 421 00:15:04,170 --> 00:15:06,004 JUST YOUR BASIC ASSISTANT STUFF. 422 00:15:06,006 --> 00:15:07,605 TAKING MESSAGES, WAKEUP CALLS. 423 00:15:07,607 --> 00:15:09,841 BOTTLE SERVICE TO THE SNAKEHOLE LOUNGE. 424 00:15:09,843 --> 00:15:11,109 CONDOM RUNS. 425 00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:13,845 COVERING FOR ME IN ANY LEGALLY-DICEY SITUATIONS. 426 00:15:13,847 --> 00:15:14,946 - I'M SORRY, WHAT DO I GET OUT OF THIS? 427 00:15:14,948 --> 00:15:17,181 - CONNECTIONS. PLUS 19 GRAND A YEAR. 428 00:15:17,183 --> 00:15:19,984 MINUS MY 10% HEADHUNTER'S FEE. 429 00:15:19,986 --> 00:15:21,986 - I HAVE TO PAY YOU TWO GRAND IF I GET HIRED? 430 00:15:21,988 --> 00:15:23,288 - I HAVE A JOB TO OFFER. 431 00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:25,823 IN THE IMMORTAL WORDS OF ROB BLAGOJEVICH, 432 00:15:25,825 --> 00:15:27,492 IT'S A [bleep] VALUABLE THING. 433 00:15:27,494 --> 00:15:29,227 YOU JUST DON'T GIVE IT AWAY FOR NOTHING. 434 00:15:29,229 --> 00:15:30,728 - ALL RIGHT, LESLIE, YOU'RE GONNA START 435 00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:33,965 HEARING SOME LOUD NOISES AND SEE SOME FLASHING LIGHTS. 436 00:15:33,967 --> 00:15:35,934 - OKAY. 437 00:15:35,936 --> 00:15:37,502 - SO YOU NEVER TOLD ME WHERE YOU'RE FROM. 438 00:15:37,504 --> 00:15:40,538 - I'M FROM PAWNEE. - KEEP STILL, PLEASE. 439 00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:41,639 AND YOU SAID THAT YOUR MOM WORKS IN GOVERNMENT TOO, 440 00:15:41,641 --> 00:15:42,707 IS THAT RIGHT? 441 00:15:42,709 --> 00:15:43,708 - YES, SHE DOES. 442 00:15:43,710 --> 00:15:46,077 - YOU GOTTA KEEP STILL. NO TALKING, LESLIE. 443 00:15:47,112 --> 00:15:48,579 WHAT KIND OF MUSIC DO YOU LIKE? 444 00:15:49,515 --> 00:15:50,848 - CAN I ANSWER THAT? 445 00:15:50,850 --> 00:15:52,183 - SURE. KEEP STILL. 446 00:15:52,185 --> 00:15:53,885 - ALL KINDS. 447 00:15:53,887 --> 00:15:55,219 - IT'S VERY IMPORTANT 448 00:15:55,221 --> 00:15:57,188 THAT YOU KEEP STILL AT THIS MOMENT, LESLIE. 449 00:15:57,190 --> 00:15:59,190 I'VE TOLD YOU THAT 1,000 TIMES. 450 00:15:59,192 --> 00:16:00,825 - [grunts] 451 00:16:01,927 --> 00:16:03,428 - DID YOU EVER BREAK YOUR ARM? 452 00:16:03,430 --> 00:16:05,296 YOU CAN ANSWER THAT. HERE, I'LL TURN IT OFF. 453 00:16:05,298 --> 00:16:06,564 - ONE TIME, I WAS ON MY BIKE, 454 00:16:06,566 --> 00:16:08,366 AND SOME BOYS WERE MAKING FUN OF ME. 455 00:16:08,368 --> 00:16:10,401 SO I CHASED THEM AND I LOST CONTROL. 456 00:16:10,403 --> 00:16:12,704 I'M SURPRISED YOU CAN SEE THAT. 457 00:16:12,706 --> 00:16:14,005 IT WAS LIKE THREE YEARS AGO. 458 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:18,109 - I CAN'T BELIEVE I TURNED THE MACHINE OFF FOR THAT. 459 00:16:18,111 --> 00:16:20,445 YOU NEVER HAD ANY KIDS, RIGHT, LESLIE? 460 00:16:20,447 --> 00:16:21,579 - NO. 461 00:16:22,081 --> 00:16:23,715 YOU'VE GOT A GREAT OVEN. 462 00:16:23,717 --> 00:16:25,016 - OKAY...TIME TO GO. 463 00:16:25,018 --> 00:16:26,751 - YOU'VE GOT AMPLE ROOM IN THERE. 464 00:16:26,753 --> 00:16:28,853 HONESTLY, IF YOU WANTED TO, 465 00:16:28,855 --> 00:16:31,723 YOU COULD GO TRIPLETS RIGHT OFF THE BAT, LESLIE. 466 00:16:31,725 --> 00:16:35,026 YOU GOT A BIG, INDUSTRIAL-SIZED OVEN. 467 00:16:35,028 --> 00:16:36,627 - SO WE'RE DONE, RIGHT? 468 00:16:36,629 --> 00:16:38,596 [phone ringing] 469 00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:42,066 - HEY, HOW'S THE DATE GOING? 470 00:16:42,068 --> 00:16:44,202 - GOOD. WE JUST FINISHED THE MRI. 471 00:16:44,204 --> 00:16:47,238 - LOOK, I KNOW I SAID THAT I WANTED TO GET BACK OUT THERE, 472 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:48,373 BUT THIS GUY IS NUTS. 473 00:16:48,375 --> 00:16:49,607 I DON'T MEAN TO OFFEND YOU. 474 00:16:49,609 --> 00:16:50,842 YOU KNOW, I KNOW HE'S YOUR FRIEND. 475 00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:52,710 - NO, I'M NOT OFFENDED AT ALL. 476 00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:54,278 I DON'T KNOW HIM THAT WELL. 477 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,247 - WHY WOULD YOU THINK HE'D BE PERFECT FOR ME THEN? 478 00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:57,849 - WELL, HE SEEMED GREAT. 479 00:16:57,851 --> 00:16:59,317 I'M SORRY, LES. 480 00:16:59,319 --> 00:17:01,386 I'LL FIND YOU SOMEBODY ELSE, OKAY? 481 00:17:01,388 --> 00:17:03,788 JUST DON'T LET THIS SOUR YOU ON DATING. 482 00:17:03,790 --> 00:17:05,823 LIKE, WHAT YOU'RE DOING IS REALLY HEALTHY. 483 00:17:05,825 --> 00:17:07,158 SO KEEP THE FAITH, OKAY? 484 00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:08,793 - YEAH, OKAY. 485 00:17:08,795 --> 00:17:11,095 - HEY, NO CELL PHONES! 486 00:17:14,633 --> 00:17:16,234 DON'T TOUCH THAT. - SORRY. 487 00:17:16,236 --> 00:17:17,802 - JUST TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF IT. 488 00:17:17,804 --> 00:17:20,138 [phone beeps off] - WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT? 489 00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:21,806 - I SET LESLIE UP ON A DATE. 490 00:17:21,808 --> 00:17:23,608 I DON'T THINK IT'S GOING THAT WELL. 491 00:17:23,610 --> 00:17:25,877 - OH, NO. WITH, UH, WITH JUSTIN? 492 00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:28,312 - OH, NO, THIS GUY I KNOW FROM THE HOSPITAL. 493 00:17:28,314 --> 00:17:30,348 - WHY WOULDN'T YOU SET HER UP WITH JUSTIN? 494 00:17:30,350 --> 00:17:31,983 - I DON'T REALLY SEE THEM TOGETHER. 495 00:17:31,985 --> 00:17:33,251 YOU KNOW? 496 00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:34,819 PLUS, LESLIE JUST GOT OUT OF A RELATIONSHIP, 497 00:17:34,821 --> 00:17:37,088 SO I DIDN'T WANT JUSTIN TO BE LIKE HER REBOUND GUY 498 00:17:37,090 --> 00:17:39,223 OR ANYTHING, YOU KNOW? 499 00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:40,725 - YEAH, THAT MAKES SENSE. 500 00:17:40,727 --> 00:17:43,828 LESLIE IS A NOTORIOUSLY CRUEL AND THOUGHTLESS PERSON. 501 00:17:43,830 --> 00:17:45,430 - WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT THIS? 502 00:17:45,432 --> 00:17:46,664 - WE'RE NOT. 503 00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:47,865 [dog barks on TV] 504 00:17:47,867 --> 00:17:49,033 - WHAT DO YOU SEE? 505 00:17:49,035 --> 00:17:50,835 - WELL, IT ACTUALLY ALL LOOKS PRETTY GOOD. 506 00:17:50,837 --> 00:17:52,870 YOU'VE GOT A LARGE BRAIN. 507 00:17:52,872 --> 00:17:54,105 - THANK YOU. 508 00:17:54,107 --> 00:17:56,040 - YEAH. NO, IT LOOKS PRETTY... 509 00:17:56,042 --> 00:17:57,642 HANG ON. 510 00:17:58,377 --> 00:17:59,844 THAT'S WEIRD. 511 00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:02,046 - WHAT? WHAT'S WEIRD? - YOUR BRAIN. 512 00:18:02,048 --> 00:18:04,182 YOU SEE THAT SHADOW RIGHT THERE? 513 00:18:04,184 --> 00:18:05,450 - WHAT--IS THAT BAD? 514 00:18:05,452 --> 00:18:06,684 - I DON'T KNOW, I'D HAVE A DOCTOR 515 00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:08,719 LOOK AT THAT IMMEDIATELY, IF I WERE YOU. 516 00:18:08,721 --> 00:18:10,455 - ARE YOU SERIOUS? 517 00:18:10,457 --> 00:18:11,856 - OH, WAIT. 518 00:18:14,126 --> 00:18:15,460 OH. 519 00:18:15,462 --> 00:18:17,628 IT WAS LIKE A SMUDGE OR SOMETHING. 520 00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:20,531 WE ALMOST WHEELED YOU OUT OF HERE IN A CHAIR. 521 00:18:20,533 --> 00:18:21,599 [chuckles] 522 00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:23,034 - SHOULD WE GO? 523 00:18:23,036 --> 00:18:24,769 - YEAH, WE SHOULD GO. 524 00:18:25,804 --> 00:18:28,039 IMAGINE IF YOU HAD TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE 525 00:18:28,041 --> 00:18:31,442 SIPPING A STEAK THROUGH A STRAW. 526 00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:33,244 THAT ALMOST HAPPENED TO YOU. 527 00:18:33,246 --> 00:18:35,246 YOU WERE A SMUDGE AWAY. 528 00:18:37,049 --> 00:18:38,716 THANK GOD I WAS HERE. 529 00:18:39,885 --> 00:18:43,020 LOOKS LIKE WE MAKE A PRETTY GOOD TEAM. 530 00:18:43,022 --> 00:18:44,589 - I'M SORRY, BUT THERE'S JUST SOMETHING WEIRD 531 00:18:44,591 --> 00:18:46,190 ABOUT THE WAY YOU TALK ABOUT HIM. 532 00:18:46,192 --> 00:18:47,992 - I DON'T KNOW, I MEAN, THERE WAS DEFINITELY TIMES 533 00:18:47,994 --> 00:18:50,995 WHEN WE THOUGHT MAYBE WE WOULD GO OUT SOMEDAY BUT-- 534 00:18:50,997 --> 00:18:52,530 - THAT'S WHY YOU DIDN'T SET LESLIE UP, 535 00:18:52,532 --> 00:18:53,631 BECAUSE YOU'RE SAVING HIM. 536 00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:54,632 - NO, I'M NOT. 537 00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:56,267 - OH, YEAH, YOU ARE. 538 00:18:56,269 --> 00:18:58,503 - OKAY, FINE, YOU DON'T HAVE SOMEONE IN YOUR LIFE 539 00:18:58,505 --> 00:19:00,404 THAT YOU THINK, "I DON'T KNOW, 540 00:19:00,406 --> 00:19:03,241 MAYBE IF THINGS WERE DIFFERENT, MAYBE SOMEDAY--" 541 00:19:03,243 --> 00:19:04,442 - SO IF I'M LATE FOR DINNER ONE NIGHT, 542 00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:06,177 YOU'RE GONNA DUMP ME FOR DUSTIN? 543 00:19:06,179 --> 00:19:08,813 - NO, NO, JUSTIN. ABSOLUTELY NOT. 544 00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:10,581 BUT IF WE BREAK UP 545 00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:13,618 OR YOU DIE TRAGICALLY 546 00:19:13,620 --> 00:19:16,120 IN A CITY PLANNING ACCIDENT, 547 00:19:16,122 --> 00:19:17,522 AND I WAIT A RESPECTFUL ABOUT OF TIME, 548 00:19:17,524 --> 00:19:18,656 I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE. 549 00:19:18,658 --> 00:19:19,790 - YOU KNOW WHAT? 550 00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:21,025 YOU CAN'T SAVE SOMEBODY FOR THE FUTURE 551 00:19:21,027 --> 00:19:22,527 WHILE YOU'RE IN A RELATIONSHIP. 552 00:19:22,529 --> 00:19:23,761 EVEN I KNOW THAT. 553 00:19:23,763 --> 00:19:25,396 - SO DID YOU WANT TO GO BACK TO YOUR PLACE OR-- 554 00:19:25,398 --> 00:19:27,832 - YEAH, ACTUALLY, CHRIS, IT WAS NICE TO MEET YOU, 555 00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:30,034 BUT I THINK THIS IS GONNA BE OUR LAST DATE. 556 00:19:30,036 --> 00:19:31,736 - I GET IT. 557 00:19:31,738 --> 00:19:34,172 YOU GET YOUR MRI AND GET OUT, HUH? 558 00:19:34,174 --> 00:19:35,406 - THIS WAS YOUR IDEA. 559 00:19:35,408 --> 00:19:36,841 - CLEVER LADY. 560 00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:39,410 GUESS I'M NOT AS GOOD A TECH AS I THOUGHT I WAS. 561 00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,379 SHOULD HAVE NOTICED THAT YOU'RE MISSING A HEART. 562 00:19:41,381 --> 00:19:42,747 - EW. 563 00:19:42,749 --> 00:19:44,582 - GOOD-BYE, LESLIE. 564 00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:50,388 - RIGHT. 565 00:19:50,390 --> 00:19:51,656 I DROVE US HERE. 566 00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:52,924 GOODY. 567 00:19:52,926 --> 00:19:54,592 - DO YOU MIND IF WE PICK UP MY SON NATE 568 00:19:54,594 --> 00:19:56,794 AT HIS BASKETBALL GAME ON THE WAY BACK? 569 00:20:02,434 --> 00:20:05,536 - SO HOW WAS THE BIG DATE? 570 00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:07,004 - WELL, THE GOOD NEWS IS I DON'T HAVE CANCER. 571 00:20:07,006 --> 00:20:10,975 THE BAD NEWS IS I GOT AN MRI BILL FOR $2,000. 572 00:20:10,977 --> 00:20:12,810 - OH, WELL, THAT SOUNDS HOT. 573 00:20:12,812 --> 00:20:14,145 - I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THE HELL ANN 574 00:20:14,147 --> 00:20:15,313 THOUGHT WE WOULD BE A GOOD FIT. 575 00:20:15,315 --> 00:20:16,614 - OH, YOU SLEPT TOGETHER? 576 00:20:16,616 --> 00:20:19,183 - WHAT? NOT SEXUALLY. 577 00:20:19,185 --> 00:20:21,752 GOD, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU, TOM? 578 00:20:21,754 --> 00:20:24,855 - THIS A BAD TIME? - NO, COME ON IN. 579 00:20:24,857 --> 00:20:26,857 - JUSTIN! - WHAT'S UP, BROTHER? 580 00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:29,727 - SHOULD WE? - YEAH, LET'S DO. 581 00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:31,295 - SEE YOU, DUDE. - SEE YOU AROUND, BROTHER. 582 00:20:31,297 --> 00:20:32,930 - DOPE PEA COAT. 583 00:20:34,333 --> 00:20:37,969 I HAVE THE SAME ONE IN AN EXTRA SMALL. 584 00:20:41,406 --> 00:20:43,941 - ANDY, CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND? 585 00:20:43,943 --> 00:20:45,443 - WELL, WELL, WELL, 586 00:20:45,445 --> 00:20:48,112 LOOK WHO'S BOTHERING WHO NOW? 587 00:20:48,114 --> 00:20:50,815 SEEMS LIKE THE SHOE IS ON THE OTHER FOOT. 588 00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:54,285 AND THE GUY WHO POLISHES SHOES IS NOW ME. 589 00:20:58,023 --> 00:21:00,157 WHAT UP? WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU? 590 00:21:00,159 --> 00:21:01,592 - WHEN YOU WERE DATING ANN, 591 00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:03,327 DID YOU KNOW THIS GUY JUSTIN? 592 00:21:03,329 --> 00:21:04,662 - UCK! JUSTIN? 593 00:21:04,664 --> 00:21:05,963 I HATE JUSTIN. 594 00:21:05,965 --> 00:21:08,099 ANN WAS SO OBVIOUSLY INTO HIM. IT WAS SO ANNOYING. 595 00:21:08,101 --> 00:21:09,467 - RIGHT. 596 00:21:09,469 --> 00:21:11,102 - I WOULD SAY, IN TERMS OF GUYS THAT SHE'S IN LOVE WITH, 597 00:21:11,104 --> 00:21:12,203 JUSTIN'S UP HERE. 598 00:21:12,205 --> 00:21:14,372 - I'M UP HERE, 599 00:21:14,374 --> 00:21:15,906 AND THEN YOU'RE DOWN HERE. 600 00:21:15,908 --> 00:21:18,542 - WELL, I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE THAT I WASN'T CRAZY. 601 00:21:18,544 --> 00:21:22,213 SO NATURALLY, I CAME TO YOU FOR REASSURANCE. 602 00:21:22,215 --> 00:21:23,414 DO ME A FAVOR-- 603 00:21:23,416 --> 00:21:25,683 DON'T TELL ANN THAT WE TALKED ABOUT THIS. 604 00:21:25,685 --> 00:21:27,184 - WILL DO. 605 00:21:27,186 --> 00:21:28,286 ANN PERKINS, 606 00:21:28,288 --> 00:21:30,788 YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF. 607 00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:32,523 WHAT YOU'RE DOING TO MARK IS NOT COOL. 608 00:21:32,525 --> 00:21:34,425 - WHY ARE YOU GUYS TALKING TO EACH OTHER? 609 00:21:34,427 --> 00:21:35,626 YOU KNOW WHAT? FORGET IT. 610 00:21:35,628 --> 00:21:37,061 I'M NOT GETTING INTO THIS WITH YOU. 611 00:21:37,063 --> 00:21:38,429 - YOU DID SOMETHING WRONG? - NO! 612 00:21:38,431 --> 00:21:40,731 - YEAH. - I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG! 613 00:21:40,733 --> 00:21:43,567 COME HERE. THIS IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. 614 00:21:43,569 --> 00:21:44,802 YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. 615 00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:46,971 - ACTUALLY, I DO KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. 616 00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:49,373 EVERY TIME I USED TO SIT AROUND ALL AFTERNOON 617 00:21:49,375 --> 00:21:51,442 PLAYING VIDEO GAMES, WEARING ONLY MY SLIPPERS, 618 00:21:51,444 --> 00:21:54,178 ALL OF A SUDDEN, I WOULD START TO FEEL BAD ABOUT MYSELF. 619 00:21:54,180 --> 00:21:55,946 AND DO YOU KNOW WHY? 620 00:21:55,948 --> 00:21:57,415 - DIDN'T YOU JUST EXPLAIN WHY? 621 00:21:57,417 --> 00:21:59,417 - I WOULD FEEL BAD ABOUT MYSELF 622 00:21:59,419 --> 00:22:02,019 BECAUSE I WOULD START TO THINK ABOUT THIS PERFECT GUY. 623 00:22:02,021 --> 00:22:04,088 ANY TIME YOU WOULD TALK ABOUT JUSTIN, 624 00:22:04,090 --> 00:22:06,457 I DIDN'T FEEL VERY IMPORTANT. 625 00:22:06,459 --> 00:22:07,992 THAT WAS ROUGH. 626 00:22:07,994 --> 00:22:09,860 - WELL, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT. 627 00:22:09,862 --> 00:22:11,829 - MAYBE IF YOU HAD, I WOULDN'T HAVE LEFT. 628 00:22:11,831 --> 00:22:15,232 BUT YOU DO KNOW NOW, SO YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE. 629 00:22:15,234 --> 00:22:16,767 IT'S EITHER ME OR JUSTIN. 630 00:22:16,769 --> 00:22:18,235 - I'M NOT GONNA CHOOSE. 631 00:22:18,237 --> 00:22:19,637 WAIT, I'M DATING MARK! 632 00:22:19,639 --> 00:22:20,671 - ARE YOU, THOUGH? - YES! 633 00:22:20,673 --> 00:22:22,440 - AH! THAT CLOSE. 634 00:22:22,442 --> 00:22:24,041 - WOW, THIS IS REALLY GOOD. 635 00:22:24,043 --> 00:22:26,444 "CEASE AND DESIST; BURDEN OF PROOF"? 636 00:22:26,446 --> 00:22:28,446 VERY FORCEFUL LANGUAGE. 637 00:22:28,448 --> 00:22:29,447 I'M A LITTLE SCARED. 638 00:22:29,449 --> 00:22:30,614 - CHECK OUT PARAGRAPH TWO, 639 00:22:30,616 --> 00:22:31,949 WHERE I DROPPED THE F-BOMB. 640 00:22:31,951 --> 00:22:34,051 - "FRIVOLOUS." 641 00:22:34,053 --> 00:22:35,920 EXCELLENT. 642 00:22:35,922 --> 00:22:38,589 - DEFINITELY HAVE THE CITY ATTORNEY LOOK AT THAT. 643 00:22:38,591 --> 00:22:40,624 BUT THAT SHOULD BE ENOUGH TO DO THE TRICK. 644 00:22:40,626 --> 00:22:43,160 - WELL, JUSTIN, I JUST-- I CAN'T THANK YOU ENOUGH. 645 00:22:43,162 --> 00:22:44,161 - IT'S MY PLEASURE. 646 00:22:44,163 --> 00:22:45,963 MAYBE I WILL SEE YOU AROUND SOMETIME. 647 00:22:45,965 --> 00:22:47,365 - YEAH, I... 648 00:22:47,367 --> 00:22:49,033 I WOULD LI--WOULD LO-- MM-HMM. 649 00:22:49,035 --> 00:22:50,835 - I'LL SEE YOU. - OKAY. 650 00:22:50,837 --> 00:22:52,203 - BYE. - BYE! 651 00:22:56,274 --> 00:22:59,810 - DAMN, HE IS ALL RIGHT. 652 00:22:59,812 --> 00:23:01,712 WHY DON'T YOU HIT THAT? 653 00:23:01,714 --> 00:23:05,049 - WELL, FRANKLY, I WOULD LIKE TO HIT THAT. 654 00:23:05,051 --> 00:23:08,386 BUT ANN'S BEING A LITTLE WEIRD ABOUT IT. 655 00:23:08,388 --> 00:23:11,188 MAYBE SHE'S GOT HIM ON HOLD. 656 00:23:11,190 --> 00:23:12,556 - WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 657 00:23:13,291 --> 00:23:15,025 - RONALD, I'VE DONE IT. 658 00:23:15,027 --> 00:23:17,495 I FOUND YOUR ASSISTANT, AND HE'S DOPE. 659 00:23:17,497 --> 00:23:20,064 HIS NAME IS JEAN-RALPHIO. 660 00:23:20,066 --> 00:23:21,098 JEAN-RALPHIO! 661 00:23:21,100 --> 00:23:22,767 - BIG "T." 662 00:23:22,769 --> 00:23:24,502 MR. SWANSON, TWO THINGS. 663 00:23:24,504 --> 00:23:27,772 ONE, IT IS AN ABSOLUTE HONOR TO MEET YOU. 664 00:23:27,774 --> 00:23:29,974 TWO, WHO IS THAT HOT INTERN CHICK OUT THERE? 665 00:23:29,976 --> 00:23:33,677 BECAUSE, HONESTLY, DAAAAMN! 666 00:23:33,679 --> 00:23:35,546 [both laughing] - UH, TAKE A SEAT. 667 00:23:35,548 --> 00:23:36,981 - RIGHT HERE. - HERE WE GO. 668 00:23:36,983 --> 00:23:38,883 - SO, JEAN-RALPHIO... 669 00:23:38,885 --> 00:23:40,017 - YOU GOT HIM RIGHT HERE. 670 00:23:40,019 --> 00:23:41,485 LEAVE A MESSAGE AFTER THE BEEP. 671 00:23:41,487 --> 00:23:43,854 - WHY DO I WANT YOU AS MY ASSISTANT? 672 00:23:43,856 --> 00:23:46,524 - FOR STARTERS, ACCESS TO THE ILLEST CLUBS. 673 00:23:46,526 --> 00:23:47,825 AND THAT'S JUST FOR STARTERS. 674 00:23:47,827 --> 00:23:50,161 I WILL WORK FOR YOU. I WILL BE ON YOU, 24/7. 675 00:23:50,163 --> 00:23:51,395 I'LL BE LIKE YOUR FAMILY. 676 00:23:51,397 --> 00:23:52,930 I'M HERE WHEN YOU GET HERE IN THE MORNING. 677 00:23:52,932 --> 00:23:54,565 SURE ENOUGH, I'LL BE THERE TUCKING YOU INTO BED AT NIGHT. 678 00:23:54,567 --> 00:23:56,500 DON'T WORRY, IT'S NOT GAY. DO WE HAVE QUESTIONS? 679 00:23:58,503 --> 00:24:00,504 - I THINK OUR ONLY QUESTION IS WHEN CAN YOU START? 680 00:24:00,506 --> 00:24:01,939 - RIGHT NOW. LET'S DO IT. 681 00:24:01,941 --> 00:24:04,241 - THANK YOU FOR COMING IN. 682 00:24:04,243 --> 00:24:05,609 WE WILL TALK. 683 00:24:05,611 --> 00:24:07,478 - COOL. I FEEL GOOD ABOUT THIS. 684 00:24:07,480 --> 00:24:09,413 HEY, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN HIT ME UP ON FACEBOOK ANY TIME, 685 00:24:09,415 --> 00:24:10,581 DAY OR NIGHT-- YOU KNOW THAT, RIGHT? 686 00:24:10,583 --> 00:24:12,683 - TAKE CARE, BUDDY. - BOOM. 687 00:24:12,685 --> 00:24:14,852 - SO WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR NEW ASSISTANT? 688 00:24:14,854 --> 00:24:17,888 - I WANNA PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE SO BAD RIGHT NOW. 689 00:24:17,890 --> 00:24:19,557 - WHAT? 690 00:24:19,559 --> 00:24:21,192 OKAY. 691 00:24:21,194 --> 00:24:23,060 MESSAGE RECEIVED. I'LL KEEP LOOKING. 692 00:24:23,062 --> 00:24:24,195 - THANK YOU. 693 00:24:24,197 --> 00:24:26,163 BRING ME THE OPPOSITE OF HIM. 694 00:24:26,165 --> 00:24:27,264 [rock music playing] 695 00:24:27,266 --> 00:24:28,732 - TELL ME WHAT ANN DID WRONG, PLEASE. 696 00:24:28,734 --> 00:24:29,934 I NEED TO KNOW. 697 00:24:29,936 --> 00:24:32,236 - NOTHING. IT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS. 698 00:24:32,238 --> 00:24:33,838 - WHAT KIND OF MUSIC IS THIS? 699 00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:36,073 - IT'S ROCK AND ROLL, MY FRIEND. 700 00:24:36,075 --> 00:24:38,075 THE KIND THAT STICKS IN YOUR BRAIN. 701 00:24:38,077 --> 00:24:40,377 LOUD, FAST, SMOOTH, 702 00:24:40,379 --> 00:24:41,612 HANDSOME ROCK. 703 00:24:41,614 --> 00:24:43,481 - THAT BAND IS REALLY BLOWING UP RIGHT NOW. 704 00:24:43,483 --> 00:24:45,349 THEY'RE NUMBER ONE ON iTUNES. 705 00:24:45,351 --> 00:24:47,818 - OKAY, I'LL TAKE ONE. 706 00:24:52,958 --> 00:24:54,959 - YOU ARE AMAZING. 707 00:24:54,961 --> 00:24:57,461 I LIKE WHEN YOU HANG OUT HERE. 708 00:24:59,664 --> 00:25:01,232 - I WANT TO BE YOUR ASSISTANT. 709 00:25:01,234 --> 00:25:02,299 - REALLY? 710 00:25:02,301 --> 00:25:04,034 YOU HATE IT HERE. 711 00:25:04,036 --> 00:25:05,970 - SO DO YOU. 712 00:25:05,972 --> 00:25:08,072 I'LL MAKE SURE YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO TO ANY MEETINGS. 713 00:25:08,074 --> 00:25:09,940 IF ANYONE COMES TO SEE YOU, 714 00:25:09,942 --> 00:25:10,975 I'LL SCARE THEM AWAY. 715 00:25:10,977 --> 00:25:12,309 - WAIT, APRIL. 716 00:25:12,311 --> 00:25:14,078 IF YOU HAD TO CHOOSE BETWEEN THESE TWO TIES... 717 00:25:16,147 --> 00:25:17,147 - YOU'RE HIRED. 718 00:25:17,149 --> 00:25:19,283 - I JUST FIGURED 719 00:25:19,285 --> 00:25:22,052 I MIGHT AS WELL GET PAID FOR BEING HERE. 720 00:25:23,588 --> 00:25:25,990 - HI. - HEY, I WAS JUST CALLING YOU. 721 00:25:25,992 --> 00:25:28,092 - HERE. 722 00:25:29,961 --> 00:25:31,762 - THIS IS A PRESCRIPTION FOR DENISE DOGAN. 723 00:25:31,764 --> 00:25:33,931 - OH, MY GOD, I'M SORRY. 724 00:25:33,933 --> 00:25:36,467 I'M SO OUT OF SORTS. 725 00:25:36,469 --> 00:25:38,102 HERE. 726 00:25:38,104 --> 00:25:39,570 - PORTER'S GRILL AT 7:00. 727 00:25:39,572 --> 00:25:40,771 - JUSTIN'S GONNA MEET YOU THERE. 728 00:25:40,773 --> 00:25:43,274 I'M SORRY CHRIS WAS SUCH A JERK. 729 00:25:43,276 --> 00:25:44,842 YOU DESERVE WAY BETTER THAN THAT. 730 00:25:44,844 --> 00:25:46,977 - IF THIS SITUATION IS WEIRD, OR IF YOU FEEL WEIRD-- 731 00:25:46,979 --> 00:25:48,245 - IT'S NOT WEIRD. 732 00:25:48,247 --> 00:25:49,747 YOU GUYS WILL REALLY LIKE EACH OTHER. 733 00:25:49,749 --> 00:25:51,348 - THANKS. - I GOTTA RUN. 734 00:25:51,350 --> 00:25:52,850 I HAVE ANOTHER STOP ON THE PRIDE-SWALLOWING TOUR 735 00:25:52,852 --> 00:25:53,951 OF CITY HALL. 736 00:25:53,953 --> 00:25:55,085 - GO GET 'EM. 737 00:25:55,087 --> 00:25:56,787 - THAT'S WHERE I NEVER FIND THINGS. 738 00:25:56,789 --> 00:25:57,988 - HEY. 739 00:25:57,990 --> 00:25:59,323 - HI, ANN. 740 00:25:59,325 --> 00:26:02,993 - SO I JUST SET UP JUSTIN AND LESLIE. 741 00:26:02,995 --> 00:26:04,929 AND I'M SORRY. 742 00:26:04,931 --> 00:26:07,965 I RENTED DISTRICT 9 743 00:26:07,967 --> 00:26:11,268 IF YOU MAYBE WANTED TO SPOIL THAT FOR ME TONIGHT. 744 00:26:13,505 --> 00:26:15,472 - [whispering] 745 00:26:15,474 --> 00:26:16,540 - OH, MY GOD! 746 00:26:16,542 --> 00:26:18,075 - DARK ENDING, RIGHT. 747 00:26:21,046 --> 00:26:22,580 - I'M BACK ON THE HORSE. 748 00:26:22,582 --> 00:26:24,949 AND THIS HORSE IS A LAWYER, 749 00:26:24,951 --> 00:26:27,251 SO I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO RIDING HIM. 750 00:26:29,054 --> 00:26:30,487 NO, WAIT. 751 00:26:32,557 --> 00:26:33,891 - TEN MONTHS AGO, SHE WAS AN INTERN 752 00:26:33,893 --> 00:26:37,561 WHO COULD GIVE A C-R-A-P ABOUT LOCAL GOVERNMENT. 753 00:26:37,563 --> 00:26:39,897 NOW, SHE'S OUR NEWEST EMPLOYEE. 754 00:26:39,899 --> 00:26:41,065 TO APRIL. 755 00:26:41,067 --> 00:26:42,266 all: CHEERS! 756 00:26:42,268 --> 00:26:43,434 - [weakly] YAY. 757 00:26:43,436 --> 00:26:45,369 - JERRY, COME AND CELEBRATE. 758 00:26:45,371 --> 00:26:46,503 - NO, THANKS. 759 00:26:46,505 --> 00:26:47,605 - WELL, EVERYBODY, 760 00:26:47,607 --> 00:26:48,973 LET'S GET BACK TO WORK. 761 00:26:52,310 --> 00:26:53,644 - WHERE ARE YOU GOING? 762 00:26:53,646 --> 00:26:56,580 - I WANT TO TALK TO RON ABOUT THE SIZE OF MY DESK. 763 00:26:56,582 --> 00:26:57,648 - JERRY... 764 00:26:57,650 --> 00:27:00,150 YOU HAVE TO SCHEDULE AN APPOINTMENT. 765 00:27:00,152 --> 00:27:01,986 - OKAY, HOW ABOUT NOW? 766 00:27:01,988 --> 00:27:03,754 - RON'S NOT HERE. - HE'S RIGHT THERE. 767 00:27:03,756 --> 00:27:05,289 I-I CAN SEE HIM. 768 00:27:05,291 --> 00:27:08,058 - I'LL LET YOU KNOW WHEN HE'S AVAILABLE. 769 00:27:08,060 --> 00:27:09,460 - [scoffs] 770 00:27:11,763 --> 00:27:13,497 - ATTA GIRL.